Today I met my friend Eric for lunch at an approximate halfway point for us and I don’t think I realized how much I missed him until I saw him, if that makes sense. He’s one of those people I can just talk to without judgement and about anything and I miss that and I didn’t realize how much I missed it until I saw him and came home again, I miss all of my friends from school but when I’m there I still miss people from home.
I’ve noticed this about going away for school and coming home for an extended amounts of time like winter break is that no matter where I am, I’m always going to wish someone else was there. When I’m home and crafting I’m going to wish that Molly and Logan were here. When I go to church at school I know that everyone there is still friendly but that doesn’t mean I don’t miss the hugs and people I know at my church. At school I miss hugs from my family when I’m upset, a hug from a friend doesn’t have the same power, no offence. If I’m on tumblr at home and see something funny I want to show Zoe right away, not just tag her in it, I want that immediate sense of laughter. I could go on and on with examples for every single friend I have, but for your sake, I won’t.
In the long run of life this is how things are always going to be. No matter where I end up there’s no way that every person I love can be there for me at all hours of everyday in case I might need them or want them there. In fact there will most likely be less people around me as I grow up because everyone has their own life to live and that’s how it’s going to be. The day will come where I will graduate and all of my college friends and I will dispearce all around and same goes for my friends and family here. I don’t know if there will ever come a point in time where I’ll pause and see people I care about all over the country from wherever I am and I’ll have new people wherever I am but they won’t be the same as the people I’ll miss just like my new friends will never replace my old ones.
I’m always going to be away from someone I care about. There’s nothing I can do to fix that, that’s the way life is. It is however, because of this that you meet new people, not to fill the spot of those missing but to find new people and friends to love. People come and go and those who matter will always be around no matter where in the world you end up you have someone or you find someone who cares. That’s what is really beautiful about life. There is an endless amount of love you have for people and yes, someone will always be missed but you add more and more people and the missing become not less frequent, but less noticeable. The best part about missing someone is seeing them again. Laughing and talking and making jokes again, because you miss the fun almost as much as you miss the person. Any relationship you have with anyone is different than that of a different friend, you can’t compare anyone to someone else because they won’t compare.
As much as I complain about people in general, the ones in my life are really great. Sometimes God grants us some of the most beautiful people and they come in and change our lives in such a special way, and I know that’s not how everyone thinks. Somedays I can’t help but think that there was a reason that every person was placed into my life and I’m very thankful for that. I’m also aware that this post is very positive, not sure why, but that’s how it went, new year, new me?