So I’ve been 22…

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Okay so I didn’t write last year (2016) around my birthday, why? Because I wasn’t writing. Am I getting better now? A little bit but not really. So, in order to try and be a better blogger I’m going to write about 22 so far.

Here’s the thing: I’m feeling it, I’m feeling 22. It’s my Taylor Swift year, and that’s the best way to look at it as a positive thing in my opinion. I have not been taking aging in my twenties thus far very gracefully, each year is met with extreme expectations that are never quite met with the enthusiasm that I picture to be. So, by making this my Taylor Swift year I’m attempting to live my life like the “22” song that everyone seems to be quoting on their Instagrams this fateful year. As well as a host of all the Taylor Swift songs that I’ve ever aspired to see myself in.

Now, I’m the first of my friends for the most who turned 22 back in September, so that’s always been like an existential thing for me, it just makes me feel older than I am. However, I would say this was definitely the best celebration yet for 22 and I had started off my year on quite the kick. By that I mean I got pretty drunk with some of my best friends. I think that set a precedent for 22. Yes, I’m drinking more than I ever have (once a week, chill out, nothing too crazy) but it’s okay. This is my last year as  a pre-adult so I’m doing whatever I want for one more year and I think that’s really okay.

22 so far has been a time for self-actualization and self-love. I’ve been letting myself really do what I want, I mean I’m sure the Zoloft helps with that, but I’m finally doing things that I’ve always wanted to but stopped myself from doing. While I’m still often referred to as mom, I’m doing less-momish things and putting myself first sometimes. Not all the time, I do still have a problem saying no, but I’m trying to get better at it. I’ve also gotten a lot better at trying to make my life work for me, and at the end of the day what’s going to make me happy.

22 so far has been a time for friendships and lack of toxic relationships. The week after my birthday I started cutting out people who were toxic to me because that isn’t something I need to deal with. So I’ve worked on friendships with people who equalize their relationship with me, if that makes sense. Yes friendships are a two-way street, and sometimes they require more give than take, but it shouldn’t be that way all the time. So I found new friends, grew old friendships, formed new ones, and left the bad ones. There are too many good people in this world to surround yourself with people who make you feel bad about yourself.

22 so far has been a time for thoughts surrounding my future, as if that isn’t what I’ve been doing for the past four years of college. However, now it’s different. It’s more real. I’m applying for jobs, seeing what is best for me and my future. I have to think about things like benefits and the cost of living in cities where I apply to jobs compared to the salary. It’s a lot to think about.

So far, I think 22 has been good to me, maybe I’ll update you when I turn 23 about how the rest of the year goes. For now, I’m feelin’ 22.

Are you 22? Did you learn something new about yourself when you were?

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So your not a feminist…

life-is-too-short-to-belived-counting-the-years-enjoy-the-ride-and-makeamazing-memories-have-a-great-birthdayOkay I get it. You are a woman and you’re not like other women. You’ve never faced adversity so you don’t really need feminism. You don’t understand why so many women are afraid of this presidency. Seriously, he said “Grab ’em by the pussy,” and then he took away the right to birth control. We are living in a society where rape culture is perpetuated, but the president.

Okay but good for you, you are “not like other girls” because you haven’t faced any problems related to your gender, and for your sake, I hope you never do.

Here’s the thing though, I’m fighting for you. I’m fighting for your right to be a stay at home mom, your right for affordable healthcare, your right for an equal pay check, and anything else you might need that someone out there wants to keep from you.

The best thing about America (hoping it stays that way) is that we have our freedom of speech, and God gave us free-will so you really don’t need to be a feminist. I just wish you would realize what the cause actually meant.

I don’t want all of you non-feminists out there to think that I find myself better than you, I don’t, seriously. I’ve seen that comment so many places, and it’s just not true. I love you so much, I just want the best for you, your daughters, your mothers, your sisters, and any other woman that has impacted your life in a positive way.

Feminism isn’t just for women. It’s for everyone and everyone can benefit, I wish you were a feminist, and I’ll never understand those of you who say you are not, however, I will fight for you. Fight for your rights. Fight for our equality.

Remember, at the end of the day, this shouldn’t be a discussion. All people are equal, treat each other as such.

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My Final Semester

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Tomorrow is my last first day of school. I might’ve said that last semester, but really this is the last one. I have never been so excited but so nervous for school to be over.

It’s weird because this is really the beginning of the end. Five months from now I’m going to be a “real” adult. No more walk-in meal under the lump sum of my meal plan, same with the apartment. Work will no longer be holding babies and doing random things for the marketing department (okay depending on how things work out that could still be a thing) but really, my life is about to really change over the next few months.

I cannot begin to describe how quickly the past four years have gone and how much I have changed. I really do feel like it was just yesterday I was dreading going back for another semester, and this year I was itching to get back. Reflecting on my time at Hood has been amazingly reassuring to me, as well as my future.

I’m not good at change, and I never have been, yet it’s something I’ve craved for as long as I can remember. Maybe it’s because of my major FOMO and I want to know what else the world can offer me, if it’s not that I don’t know what it could be. However, whenever I get to the new I end up afraid of missing what I left behind which is probably why I hated my freshman year of college.

I think the greatest lessons I learned during my time here so far, well those outside of class includes who to trust, how to get to that point, and not everyone changes/evolves at the same rate as you. College has allowed me to meet a lot of people and realize what I’m looking for not only in friends but mentors and bosses.

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UPDATED Netflix Suggestions

Are you ready for a lot of snow days? Or just a Saturday that you don’t want to do anything but veg out in front of the TV (literally me everyday)? Well I’ve got you covered for at least a few binge sessions.

A long, long time ago, I gave some of my favorite shows on Netflix, however, in the two and a half years since I’ve watched a LOT of shows and have a whole list of new favorites.  To be honest, a lot of them will be kind of weird and creepy because that’s what I’ve been into lately so keep that in mind.

  1. 3% — I watched this with Aleyna and I think there were probably a few nights where we stayed up past my bedtime to get another episode in. It was one of those shows that if I wasn’t watching it with someone I would have finished it in a day. Originally in Portuguese, so the mouths and words don’t line up very well, but it is very good. It is a society where only 3% of the population can make it to the promise land and live happily and peacefully.
  2. The 100 — This was recommended to me by my blogging accountability buddy and friend, Katie. I think I watched it in a week. Three seasons (which is always a plus for me) that are a little creepy but really good.
  3. The OA — Amazing. Only one season, but truly amazing.
  4. The Office — Okay so maybe this was one the last one too, but really, you need to watch it and if you haven’t yet, what are you doing? Guaranteed to make you laugh at least once or I’ll do a cartwheel for you because that’s pretty impressive.
  5. Scrubs — Another funny show. I was watching it to fall asleep to, but I got sucked it and ended up staying up to watch it, so I went back to How I Met Your Mother for that, but it is really funny. I had seen an episode here and there, but not the whole series, and it’s really funny. The last season is a little disappointing, but it’s still really good.
  6. Stranger Things — Okay not to be that person, but I did watch the whole season the day it came out and before it was super hyped. If I would’ve heard about it after all the hype, I probably wouldn’t watch it just because it was too much for me. However, it was so good and totally worth the hype around it. If you haven’t seen it yet, definitely check it out.
  7. Black Mirror — Each episode is different and each episode will confuse the heck out of you but in the best way.
  8. Quantico — So good. I was staying caught up with it on TV but of course I lost my spot and I’ll catch up once the season is on Netflix. However, it’s about the FBI training school and someone in the group committed an act of terror. The way it is set up, is a back and forth way of things which is pretty cool.
  9. Containment — Watching as I write this. I guess I’m kind of into sci-fi-ish shows right now. It is about when a virus breaks out and a portion of Atlanta is under lock down. I highly recommend it.
  10. Good Girls Revolt — Well this is not technically on Netflix, but Amazon Prime. However, it had to make the list just because I could not stop watching it. It’s about a newsroom in the 1960s and it’s so good. The feminism is perfection. It makes you want to change the world. It’s set to be cancelled, but I am hopeful that someone will pick it up.

What are you currently binge watching? Or just regular watching?

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2017 Goals

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The yearly post. This is quite possibly the only yearly blog post that I have routinely written. As I wrote in a post earlier this week, I am beyond ready for the new year, and here are the many (that I will hopefully keep) goals for 2017. As I point out every year (I think), I make goals rather than resolutions because I don’t want to make myself change but rather just make goals to achieve, if that makes any sense. This year a lot revolve around my blog because other than Donald it was probably my biggest disappointment of 2016.

  1. Blog at LEAST three times a week.
  2. Go self-hosted, break out of .wordpress (eek!!)
  3. Get my first real adult job doing something I love.
  4. Move out of my parent’s house.
  5. Travel somewhere cool.
  6. Grow in my relationships with God and Jesus.
  7. Learn something new
  8. Eat better– i.e. eventually no more dairy or soy, the crux of all of my stomach issues
  9. Find a therapist wherever I end up post-graduation to continue positively growing with my mental health.
  10. Be creative all the time, in thinking, in daily life, constantly expanding my mind in creativity.

What are your goals for the new year?’

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2016 Goal Review

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I know I have a tendency to put the two together, but really that’s annoying long so enjoy the reflection the day before the goals this year!

So basically my goals for 2016 were fewer so I’d be more apt to complete them all, however, that was a bust and I don’t know if I completed any, but here we go anyway:

Take better care of myself- I feel like I am so weird about chemicals that I put on my body, so I need to be more careful about what chemicals I put into my body too. I eat crap. I care but I don’t. I put way too much processed foods in my body and I really do need to be better about it. 

Blog better and often- I want to blog as much as I can as often as I can. I want to be a better blogger. This is the only post besides LNBM that goes up past 7 pm. I want to utilize drafts and just be better with planning. I don’t want to be a daily blogger, but I want to be a frequent blogger. I don’t want to commit to a certain number of days, I just want it to be often. Lesson learned, I need a schedule. Without one, it won’t get done it becomes less of a priority for me because there is no pressure to do it. 

Find an internship- self-explanatory. I want to expand my professional horizons and make sure I know what I want to do. I found three! I worked at the Downtown Frederick Partnership last semester, have one at home over break, and I got one for next semester. 

Give 100% to everything- this ties in with biting off more than I can chew. I want to do a few things but put all of my effort into those few things that way I can give 100% to everything I’m doing. Well, my therapist tells me that I need to learn how to say no, and she’s right. I’m always biting off more than I can chew, it’s a real problem that I have and maybe I will get better at it, and maybe I won’t. 

Create more- I just want to be more creative, make sure I’m always expanding that part of my mind. Nope. Honestly, I would have to say that 2016 has been my least creative year. I’d like to blame it on something but I don’t know what to blame it on. 

Be more open to new ideas and things- I want to try more. I always do the same mundane things and I want to keep all of the new of 2015 going. I am proud to say that the last few months I have been really good at saying yes, and trying new things. They might also be mundane, but at least they’re new mundane. 

A year scrapbook- part of being creative and  part of keeping track of my life. I take so many pictures, I want to do something with them. I want it to be a yearly thing, so I will see how it goes during 2016. Back to the creativity thing, I didn’t take a lot of pictures this year. There is not enough to make a scrapbook out of, which is kind of sad. I guess it happens though. 

So maybe I wasn’t as successful, but I’m really looking to 2017 as a positive year. I think I do better with odd numbers and maybe that’s what I need. An odd year. How’d you do with your goals or resolutions?

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Welcoming the New Year: 2017 I’m Ready for You.

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2016 has been a rough year globally, and personally, however as December set in I began to take in about a million realizations that the new year will contain for me.

2017 is going to be a year of change, not just for me but for the world. I think there is a general consensus that 2016 was a shit year, but I’m holding out hope (and putting it into the universe) that 2017 is going to be a lot better. My goals (to be released later this week) will hold the fate of this blog, my “real” future and a bunch of other things I’m sure.

2016 brought me some good things, like I finally saw a therapist, cut off some people that were detrimental to my well-being, and God pushed me to some really good people which made for some really great friends. I hope that this  year, the friendship cycle that seems to constantly be rotating ends and the people I have found stay.

2017 will bring graduation, moves (maybe), a job (hopefully), and all around some major life changes. I don’t know if I have ever been so scared excited for a new year. It will also bring an administration I am afraid of, but will continue to pray for and protest. Women, it is time to fight for our rights, there are too many that have suffered, we can’t let it continue. Minorities, fight. Please fight. It is nearly 2017 and everyone I can’t believe there are so many large groups of being fighting for equality.

The next few days will bring reflection of old goals and the birth of new ones. I will not be posting my statistics of the year, if they’re even available this year, mostly  because there is not a single piece of me that wants to know how much they have gone down. 2017 will be different. I’m determined to make it my year.

2017, I’m ready for you.

Amidst the Rebrand

I’ve been pretty absent this year and there’s a lot of excuses I can make for it, but at the end of the day there really isn’t a reason for it other than I just was unmotivated.

Recently, I met with the career center about rebranding and what my brand should be, all of that fun stuff that I will be dealing with in the next several months. With that came some disappointment, well not quite disappointment but some confusion. While I felt really good about myself afterwards, what it has basically come down to is that I have a few options:

  1. Completely start over (not going to happen)
  2. Private things that future employers might be turned off by (i.e. my opinion)
  3. Do nothing and maybe get somewhere by the luck of the draw

While I got some great advice for what my brand should be, we talked about making everything that doesn’t fit my new brand (post-college stuff and struggles) private. I just feel so icky about doing that for some reason. I have no idea why but making parts of my blog that has really been my identity for the past three years private feels so wrong.

I also feel odd about holding back my opinions. I have a lot of them, they are no longer weekly rants (lol at the old daily blogger) but they’re still in my head. She said that things (like my Trump piece) could turn a future employer off from hiring me. At the same time, do I want to work for a company that suppresses my opinions, or support Donald Trump? The answer is a very strong no.

However, the coolest part about the whole meeting was learning how to be a mommy blogger without the kids. She explained to me that post-college life is weird, friends will leave, get married, that I’ll go through jobs and cities, and it’s just a weird time and that’s what I should be writing it. I get to write about everything I love and I don’t really have to pick a particular niche.

The future of my blog excites me. I’ve spent a lot of the time that I haven’t been blogging researching it and what to do about certain things pertaining to my blog and the “industry” as well.

The weirdest thing to me about my relationship with Mary’s Average Adventures is how afraid I am of it. I love blogging (more than anything) and I really love this site and everything I’ve created around it, but I’m so afraid to see what will happen to it. I’m afraid to see it fall or change too much. I’m afraid of forgetting about it. And really I’m afraid that I will never be the right person to let it live up to it’s full potential. I’ve treated my blog like a child to me for ages, I brag about it, tell people all the cool things that it has done for me and yet, I also don’t take care of it like I should. Oh man, if this was a real child it definitely would have been taken away from me for neglect. Well, thank goodness it can’t breathe.

Anyway, I guess this is basically just another post on what I’m doing with the site. And believe me it’s getting there. Actually within the next few days it’s going to be the 12 days of Christmas again so you’ll be hearing a lot more from me!

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Waking Up to Trump

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You should be scared. America, one of the world’s leading powers elected a racist, sexist, homophobic man to be our leader yesterday. I have never been so fearful for our country.

I am too young to remember all of 9/11. I remember that it was scary, I remember that we left school early, and I remember my mom crying. Today will be a day I never forget. I will never forget last night watching the polls come in. I will never forget waking up and remembering last night and the impact that will have on the rest of my life. I will never forget reading that my 8 year old cousin is afraid of the president elect. I will never forget fearing that my future children could grow up in a world that is the complete opposite of what I’ve envisioned for them my whole life.

I was hopeful that my future daughters would know that a woman can do anything. I am now so, so fearful that my future daughters will grow up thinking that it is okay for a man to say “grab her in the pussy” and for my future sons to think that saying such things is okay. Yes, I can teach them better, but I cannot control what they hear beyond the doors of my future home.

I am scared to be a woman. I will pray every time I walk out the door. A man who is on trial for rape can be our leader, how is that not perpetuating the rape culture? As if I wasn’t scared enough before. One in four college women is sexually assaulted, and the president has so many allegations against him, but that’s okay because at least he didn’t use a private email server. Imagine being a woman who was assaulted by him, she has to face the fact that he is the leader of the “free” world.

Don’t even get me started on the way he treats minorities. You cannot ban a religion. This country was based on the freedom of religion, that is why people came here. You cannot take that away. The fact that a person won who wants to do that is disgusting and repulsive. He makes fun of people with disabilities, how can you excuse that? America was made to be a safe haven for the world, and he is taking the away from us and the world.

I will pray for the future of this country, but I will also pray that I can find some temporary work outside of these borders. I don’t think I can live in a place that is filled with so much hate for minorities. I’m going to pray more and more every day of my life until there is hope restored in my heart and love replaces all the hate that he perpetuates. I will pray and go to church everyday if I have to, I hope that God can work through me to make all of this hate love, because frankly I feel sick by this country.

This is a very sad day for America. I hope that if you voted for Trump, you can tell your daughters why. I hope you can explain to every woman in this country why he is okay for us, what he will do for women, the answer is NOTHING.

Trump doesn’t give a shit about anyone except himself. He wants to stop immigration and his wife is an immigrant, will he deport her? No. Just the Muslims because they’re a “threat” when really they believe in peace. They are the extremists. If you are basing your ideas of Islam off of the extremists, please base your vision of Christianity on the Westboro Baptist Church and the KKK, who by the way endorse the president elect.

So enjoy America. These are the unfortunate choices that were made by the electoral college (what a joke) and not by the people. Good luck, and I’m going to find somewhere else to go. This was not my choice. I do not accept him as my president.

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I’m Back (for Real)

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It’s real. I’m going to blog again. My life has gotten crazy and my blog has definitely taken a back seat to all of my other commitments. However, this is something that I truly love doing so I’ve done my research, got Katie as my accountability buddy and from this point forward there will be a blog post every week until the end of 2016.

A lot has changed since I’ve been here last, I have a million jobs (that I love!!) I’ve been to DC (not really new, it’s too close to be new at this point), a few haircuts, and I turned 22. I am most excited about the later, it my Taylor Swift year and so far it’s been off to a good start especially since my haircut makes me feel like her.

By this point, if you are a reader, you’ve seen my anxiety post, so that’s new too. I have also gotten a new planner which I’ve created to be a blog binder as well. I cannot wait for the new year for a lot of reason, but a big one is all of the inserts that I can buy on Etsy, because IT’S A FILOFAX!! I found an affordable one at Michael’s and with the 40% off coupon, I couldn’t say no. Expect a post on that in the near future.

I’ve been doing a lot of research on how to be a better blogger. I think I’ve done more research on blogging this year than actual blogging. I hit a rut, acknowledged a multitude of times, and now I plan on really doing something about it. I have an accountability buddy, so really, I have no excuse from this point forward.

How do you stay motivated as a blogger? Any tips or tricks I should take into account? Let me know!!

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