Pause

via Daily Prompt: Pause

I saw the Daily Prompt for today was “Pause” and it ties in a little too perfectly with my life right now.

I keep hitting the fast forward button when I should be hitting pause. I shouldn’t be wishing my last six weeks of college away, yet here I am staring at my semi-daunting to-do list not wanting to do any of it.

I’m waiting for the end of the week, waiting to hear if I got a job or two, or none. But I shouldn’t be waiting for that moment. I should be savoring every moment. Cherishing the time I spend with the kids I watch because soon (well hopefully) I’ll be working full time and I probably won’t be a nanny anymore. I should be taking mental pictures of every meal with my roommates, every time I walk across the cherry-blossom filled campus, and just every little moment that I can hold on to, I should be holding on.

I’ve reached a point where I’m so focused on whatever’s next that I’m not pausing anymore, when really I should be pausing more. No more fast forward, just a nice hold down on the pause so it’s almost a stop.

My mom told me when I was starting high school that life would only get faster, I don’t know if I didn’t believe her, or just didn’t know what she was talking about, but she was right. I’ve been blogging for three and a half years, it feels like it was just yesterday I was cursing WordPress for being stupid (eh could’ve been yesterday) but my time online and in college has been flying by. I can’t believe that I’m graduating in six weeks, but here I am wishing I was graduating tomorrow just to get on with the next part of life.

I think that’s probably not just a me problem, even more of a societal problem. We’re so focused on the future, what are we doing this weekend, next week, the next deadline. We forget to focus on what is happening right now. Right now is what really matters. Maybe we all need to take some time and just pause.

So take a moment, pause, reflect, think about right now. Right now, I’m at work, right now, I’m at a decent place in my life, right now.

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Saved by the Bell

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Saved by the Bell.”

I had to respond to this post simply because of the title, what a great show. Anyway, I am the kind of person that gets saved by the bell probably about 30% of the time.  I’m one of those people who says the wrong thing at the wrong time and nine times out of ten I feel like my foot is in my mouth, it’s probably not, I just feel like it is.

I say a lot or I guess I could say that I have been saved by the bell, quite frequently.  I guess that would also tell you how frequently my foot should be in my mouth. This issue comes with not having much of a filter when I’m talking. I just say what I think and I can’t help it. I need to further develop my filter because at the moment it doesn’t hold back much of anything.

I can’t even think of my biggest “saved by the bell moment” there are too many. I’m sure my friends have gotten me out of conversations that I was talking myself into a hole. I don’t know when to shut my mouth basically is the moral of this story. It’s not even like I mean it half the time, the words just come out in a mixed up way that I don’t mean them to. It just gets jumbled up in my brain and things come out worse than I mean them to.  I wish I had a really good story but it’s just so frequent that there’s no good story that just jumps out to me.

Moral of the story, learn from me, think about what you say before you say it, because then you don’t need to think about being saved by the bell, you don’t even have to get in those situations.  I really wish I had a totally cringe worthy story to share but I can’t think of any. Just I hope you never have to be saved by the bell, instead just watch the amazing show.

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Yin to My Yang: Soulmates

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Yin to My Yang.”

Let me be quite frank, I don’t know if I believe in soulmates the way that people mean the term. I think there are different kind of soulmates, and maybe that the soulmate isn’t just one, I think that there can be more than one because every situation has choices and two people might not make the same decisions every time which can lead to heartbreak, or just a complete breakaway before it even comes to love or the idea of a soulmate, it’s just that they could’ve been one of them.

When I think “Yin to My Yang” I honestly don’t even think about love or a soulmate. I think about my best friends. I’m not really good friends with anyone who is super similar to me. I’m friends with people who contrast me so well that it just works. I don’t ever think about that in relationships like that though. I don’t know why, but when I’m thinking about relationships, I’m never thinking about finding my perfect opposite, I don’t know what I’m thinking about, but I don’t think it’s that.

I once saw soulmates described like this:

“You don’t have only one soul-mate. If you did, you would have married your best friend three years ago. She knows you better than her right hand and she’ll listen to you cry from eight states away. You don’t have only one soul-mate because people wake up different parts of you- parts you never even knew existed. The boy when you were 15 taught you what it felt like to get caught kissing in a closet at the party you never should have been at in the first place, without his lips ever touching yours. When you were 18 a boy let you know what it’s like to have your heart lodged in your throat because he’s moving 2,000 miles away, and he won’t tell you when he’ll be back. You wait until you’re 22 to get attached again, and this time you felt it in every inch. It’s as if you got struck by lightning- the Lichtenberg figure crawls up  your arms and across your back, like his hands on your skin while you laid in bed together and you thought the thump of your heart was in time with his. You don’t have one soul-mate; instead, you have soul-mates, because your heart in huge and you have the room.” –s.m

To me this is the perfect description of soulmates in general. I think there are so many people that your soul connects with and I think that’s the perfect thing about love. That’s the great thing that we get to experience as humans. We get to be Yins and Yangs, for all different people and they get to be that for us. Soulmates don’t always have to be romantic. We can love people without having to worry about if they are the one destined for us because there are so many people that are destined for us. There are so many people that are meant to be in our lives, whether that’s temporary or forever.

I don’t know if any of this is true, but there are so many people in my life that don’t necessarily make sense. Take Hannah for example, if we didn’t meet as children, I don’t know if we ever would have been friends in high school, we were in such different circles, but because of that she has turned into one of my best friend soulmates.  There are people I’m no longer friends with, but they helped me so much in life that there had to be a reason that they were here, so they are the temporary soulmates. Then there’s recent people in my life like Eric, and I couldn’t tell you when he became my best friend, but he is, so he’s another one of those best friend soulmates. There are so many people that can come into your life at any given time and you just have to trust that they are there for a reason. Whether they are the Yin to your Yang or the Yin to your Yin, soulmates are all around you.

What do you think?

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Out of Reach

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Out of Reach.

I feel like a lot of the time I play the “poor me” game and I just think everything is out of reach. However, that’s really not true.  I am rather fortunate and I’m starting to believe that there aren’t that many things out of reach. Maybe it’s because I got some good news yesterday, or maybe I’m just growing up, however, life is good, and why change that?

The prompt suggests talking about the ex who got away, maybe it’s best that they got away. Like maybe they got away for a reason, that’s what I like to think at least. I would say that the one who got away from me, was supposed to go away because if he would’ve stayed I can’t say I would be the same, who knows if I would even blog, who knows what my life would’ve been like and I like to think that he left for good reason. While it took a while to accept, I’m finally comfortable that he did and hurt me, because the pain could have been a lot worse later.

It also mentions places. I don’t like to think that places are out of reach, the most out of reach I would say is Antarctica because it’s really hard to go there if you aren’t a scientist or doing research, however, it is a goal and I’m sure I’ll reach it one way or another.

There’s also nothing I would change to have something in my life again. I’m a big believer in fate, once something goes, it can be gone. I guess I would change things I said to people or how I reacted to certain situations. but I’m very content with my life now so I don’t want that to change. I’m afraid that if I could change my decision or change my life in anyway that I wouldn’t be where I am today and I don’t think I would like that. All decisions create this ultimate life, which right now I’m very happy with and I don’t want it to be any different. So yes, while things may seem out of reach sometimes, maybe that’s for a reason, and I think that people like me just need to push through it. Don’t limit yourself to the past and things that could have happened. Push yourself past that and embrace the now, you never know what might happen from it. Think about it!

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