decisions

My Life, Just Mine.

Mary2 Comments

I knowingly put a lot of information about my life on the internet, personal details that most people would be less willing to share, however this does not mean that I am subjecting myself to pointless questions and being told what to do via people I know in real life simply because of what they would do in my shoes. Sure, sometimes I ask for advice, but when I don’t, I don’t need the comments like “well why wouldn’t you do *insert something I don’t want to do*” “If you do that then you have to do this” or my favorite “I just don’t  understand why you can’t/won’t do *something I can’t or won’t do*”. I am very well aware that people have their opinions but I don’t know why they need to be shared if I’m not asking and it doesn’t affect you.

My choice not to drink has seemed to bother people in the past, which I don’t understand. The fact that I don’t see the need to not remember my night for some reason really gets to people as if me getting drunk provides some sort of good deed to them. The pressure that friends have put on me in the past has only further hindered any desire I’ve had to drink underage, or ever for that matter. I don’t understand how this is anyone’s business but my own, however everyone likes to put in their two cents on the matter anyway.

Again, I willingly put mostly every detail about my personal life on the internet for all to see, I mean for some odd reason over 300 people have decided to follow this blog and anywhere from 40-100 people read it a day which gives a lot of people a lot of information about my life and that really doesn’t bother me. However, unless I am asking directly for advice or what I should do in a situation I don’t know why people give so much input on my life, does this happen to everyone or just me?

I hear this happens a lot as you get older, especially when you’re pregnant/parenting/having kids while I don’t expect that to happen for a while I cannot believe how many people, strangers that I just randomly meet, even have input on my life decisions. Last year during my first week of classes a guy asked me my major and I said “Communications and maybe political science or something like that, I really like his—” before I could even finish my sentence out of his mouth came “Why would you want to do anything like that? The best majors are the sciences and math, I’m Computer Science, you should really look into it, it’s so great!” He went on and on about how great his major was before I could even finish the question he asked and I had just met him that day! It’s my life, I didn’t know him, and I don’t know how my decision to go into the humanities affects him so much that he had to go on a rant about how great his major was. Just because he was happy and content with his field of study it doesn’t mean that’s how I would feel there, especially with what I started telling him this. It happened again recently when a friend had to go to the hospital and the man taking her blood was asking about our majors since the hospital is right next to the school, and he said “Communications?! What on earth can you do with that?” and I don’t know how to respond to questions that I get like this (all the time, usually not from complete strangers) because I don’t know what exactly I want to do. However, why does it matter to him what I’m going to do with my degree? It doesn’t affect him whether I go onto great things at a newspaper or God forbid I end up at Starbucks, it doesn’t change his life at all.

What I’m trying to get across here, is unless someone asks for your opinion or advice there’s really no point in giving it. If I’m answering your question, why tell me how wrong I am? What’s the point? I can do my life and you can do yours and we can live in harmony, but my choice to not do drugs, not have sex until I’m married, to be a communications major, and doing my life the way I want to, doesn’t affect anyone else but me and the people it directly relates to and the unneeded commentary about my personal decisions can stop at anytime please and thank you.

Does anyone else have this problem or just me?

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Why it’s Good to Mind Your Business

Mary2 Comments

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I see a lot of articles on why it’s good to have kids young or wait, get married young or wait, move in with a significant other or wait, go to college or not, but really it’s no one’s life but your own. Everyone has an opinion. I understand that, it’s just that your opinion on someone else and their life doesn’t really matter and it shouldn’t affect them either way.

Today I got on Facebook and I saw an article “Why it’s good to get married young” and I was mad at first. It goes on about how it’s God’s gift to be married young, but for someone like me that is nothing that I’ve ever wanted. I don’t want someone judging me for not wanting to get married young, but I also should stop judging people who are at a point in their life where they feel stable enough to get married young.

I think the internet is great and all but I think there are some opinions that are actually personal decisions. I think there is too much pressure on people to make very personal decisions via something they read. I know I’ve read things which referred to me as a terrible Christian room just because I didn’t want to be a stay at home mom, or let alone a mom. This really offended me as a Christian woman and it was just someone’s opinion that was trying to influence my future when really God does call people to the single life and that’s my choice of whether or not to be a mother.

Sure it’s cool to get married at 20 but it’s also just as cool to get married at 65. If you want to have loads of babies go for it, but if you want to have none or one go for it! I’m tired of all these people trying to tell everyone what to do, let them live their lives and mind your own freaking business! I think we are all too far concerned with how other people live their lives and how they should live more like us or the lives we want to have and really NO ONE KNOW WHAT THEY’RE DOING WE ARE ALL JUST FIGURING IT OUT AS WE GO! You can’t do your own life wrong. I mean unless you’re a rapist or something I wouldn’t recommend that lifestyle but honestly everyone has to make their own choices so stop trying to control them. You do you and I’ll do me.

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College, The Debate

Mary2 Comments

So I’ve been at college now for a little over six months, that however does not make me any sort of expert, but I have realized certain things not only about myself but the institution as a whole. Once upon a time I strongly believed that you could not be successful without a college degree unless you wanted to be in some sort of spotlight. This is not true, there are plenty of professions that you can advance in without a college degree, one I recently found out about is banking. There are also many managerial positions in a variety of fields that one can climb the chain of command to obtain. There are paths to successful lives without a college degree.

For me I always looked forward to high school graduation to go to college. It wasn’t until about half way through my senior year that I considered differing a year and taking a gap year. This is actually only one of my best friends Katie knows, so surprise mom and dad, I thought about taking a gap year. Anyway, I obviously didn’t do that, mostly because I was afraid that I would never go back and end up stuck at a dead end job the rest of my life. I believe, no matter how hard it is sometimes, that I did make the right decision to go to college, but really it’s not for everyone. I remember going through the college search and everyone asking me “Can you see yourself there in two years?” and my answer was always no to that specific college, however I still saw myself in college. So I went (came?) and I’m still here.

To be honest, I really don’t think college is for everyone. Obviously if one of my sisters told me they didn’t want to college I would worry for their futures, mostly because I would like to mooch off of them one day (that’s joke), however I would support them. I think a lot of successful people are going to start emerging without college degrees soon. I mean, there are bundles of successful bloggers who are making money and a lot of them are still in college. What it all comes down to, is the question of whether or not you want to do it. It’s a personal thing. I believe that if you have the mindset and passion to do something you’ll do whatever it takes to get it, you’ll be able to reach your goal.

Okay so that’s it for today. I think one of my friends is going to help me with blogvention but I’m open to more! So let me know  if you are interested in helping and planning!

XOXO,

Mary.

Finals Week

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Well I never thought I would actually be this stressed about finals week, I had always believed it to be an over dramatized college myth, nope the stress is real. I spent all day studying for a class I have a solid A in, and now I will study until about 11 or 11:30 that for no matter what I do I will have a B in the class so there’s that too. I do not see myself pulling any all-nighters because I really don’t believe that helps anything at all. I think it’s been so stressful for me because of my panic attacks lately and they really aren’t going to get any better anytime soon it seems.

Anyway I’m sitting here studying away for history, and I’m just like wow I really like history. So now I’m like how can I fit this into my college career, I mean I don’t want to be a history major because they can’t do anything. I’m thinking, and thinking and I’m like oooo minor! And then I keep thinking and I’m like wow I really like my communications class too, can I keep that in my outlook somehow, yes, a minor.  That would put me at a triple minor and that’s just silly, so now I’m like well I could double major in global issues and political science and then I could minor in history and communications, but that is FOUR things. I can’t do that with my life, no way I’d be able to graduate early with a load like that. So then I’m thinking, really what is another semester? But it’s another semester of being unhappy, which leads me to think: WHAT THE ACTUAL HELL AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE?? Why am I at college when I want to do absolutely everything? This doesn’t make sense.  So I went from wanting to double major and double minor to wanting to drop out in a split second.  I have a lot of thinking to do over break and what it all comes back to is that I should’ve done a gap year.  Oh well, what can I do? Nothing now.

Well anyway sorry about that random spurt of nothing useful about my life but finals week is allowing little time for an in depth blog post today, maybe Friday? Hopefully soon there will be something good, I can’t wait! Good luck to anyone else who is taking finals this week!

XOXO

Mary

What am I doing here?

Mary4 Comments

This seems to be a question that I have been asking myself a lot recently.  I don’t feel happy here.  I don’t know if I’ve mentioned it at all in any other of my posts but I am seriously considering transferring.  To be honest I was never really sure about coming here in the first place, it wasn’t really my first choice.  When it came down to choosing a school I had very few options. When I went looking for schools I had a very hard time finding ones I likes, so it came time to apply and I only applied to two. I got accepted to both, one with very little financial aid, and one with a lot.  I chose the one with a lot so I would be able to come out without debt.  I came back to spend the night here before I committed and I didn’t really feel at ease at all.  It was then that I started questioning why I wanted to go here in the first place, but there really wasn’t much I could do.  I could go to community college for a semester and transfer somewhere else in the spring and continue to look at colleges, but I didn’t want to do that because I needed to get out of my hometown, if I would’ve stayed there any longer I would have gone crazy.  I could’ve done that for a year as well.  One of the major reasons I was worried about doing that was because I didn’t want to end up moving into management where I worked and end up staying there the rest of my life. So I think I made the wrong decision and came to a school I didn’t like.

Up until this point I thought I was going to be fine, I would study abroad and hopefully I would be able to graduate a semester early and I thought I had made rather good friends here but now they seem slightly crazy.  For whatever reason I seem to get along with the commuters really well which sucks so besides my one commuter friend and the two or three others I seem to be making I don’t really have any reason to stay.  So now I’m applying to schools and I’m just gonna see what happens. If worse comes to worse I stay here and if I transfer I transfer.  I’m seeing it as if I have nothing to lose because I really don’t.  Feel free to comment with your opinions on transferring, especially if any of you guys have already done it because that would be awesome! Thanks for reading!

XOXO

Mary

 

Major Desicions (literally)

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Oh my gosh guys, I am so sorry on the super long update! I want to say I’ve been busy (and it’s kinda true) but to be one hundred percent honest I just kept forgetting and remembering at the most inconvenient of times.  I have been keeping pretty busy with homework, studying and yesterday was my birthday so I was out with my friends most of the day. In my free time I’ve been crocheting my friend a scarf for her birthday so there’s that too. Anyway so pretty much this is gonna be a quick post on the decision to pick a major because I have to leave for class soon.

So I go to a liberal arts school, which pretty much means you try a bunch of different stuff and you don’t start concentrating on your major until the later years and here I don’t even declare until sophomore year. Currently my major of intent in Communications with a concentration in Journalism and either a major or minor in Political Science but lately I’ve been considering either adding Social Work or taking away communications and adding that in. I’m not really sure. But this is a HUGE decision. After I graduate I really want to either go to the Middle East or India and teach young women how to read and speak English so that they can go to college and go out in the world and do something else with their lives so they don’t have to be just mothers and teachers, they can be scientists and historians and doctors. So I’m just not sure how to do money with that. Anyway let me know your opinions on majors and shit, I have to get ready for class. Sorry about the short post everyone!

XOXO

Mary

Convocation and Other Stuff.

Mary2 Comments

So sorry about the missing the past few days, it’s been super busy. HA just kidding. I’ve been watching Netflix on my laptop so I couldn’t type at the same time. So any way, today was the last day of orientation and the start of classes yippee! To finish off orientation we had our convocation and received our dinks (if anyone has a question about that put it in the comments and it will be the first picture posted of me!) and had to sit in the heat and listen to people talk and it was boring. After that I had lunch went back to my dorm with some of the friends I made and then I went to my first class. My major of intent is Communications with the intention to concentrate in Journalism with either a double major or minor in Political Science, so anyway my first class was Mass Media and Society. The professor was really funny but some people in the class seemed a little snooty and that was kinda annoying. Anyway so that was today.

Now I’m back in my dorm watching some YouTube videos and I’m going to go to dinner soon but I wanted to write about something I’ve been struggling with the past couple of days and that is loneliness. I think for most people college is a time to find the friends that they will have for life because they didn’t have great friends in high school, but my experience differed from that of a lot of peoples, and I know I already have those friends back home. So for me being here and trying to make friends is hard because I just don’t seem to be making that connection with anyone like most people are. I did make one friend but she’s a commuter so that means breakfast and dinner alone and that wasn’t as bad when it was just the freshman but now it’s everyone and the dining hall is always more crowded and that’s a little frustrating. So if anyone else is struggling with that let me know because I don’t know if I shouldn’t be feeling like this. So comment with your experiences so I can try to help and maybe someone out there has some advice for me too! So hopefully there will be an update tomorrow but I’m not exactly sure on what.

XOXO

Mary