Update Day

These seem to be the only days lately that I can get right, updates. So this week was a rough one. I know I told you guys last week that I was struggling with my anxiety through the night into Sunday and then all day, well that didn’t stop. That went on until Thursday and it finally started calming down Friday, and I only had one yesterday, so I thought things were looking up until I got back tonight and started having them again. It really made my week long and I spent most of my time crying and wanting to sleep, but I couldn’t. I don’t know why they keep happening, but it’s hard to do anything when I feel this shitty.  It was about mid week when I decided that I was going to go home after my Saturday seminar just because I needed to be with people who knew how to deal with me. Some other things that happened…. Well we had a delay on Tuesday which pushed my bio test back to Thursday, but then on Thursday the proctor never showed up, most people left after fifteen minutes because that’s the rule, I stayed for a half an hour because I’m a paranoid person. Anywho, I actually went out with a group of girls on Friday and had fun! We went to Bone Fish for dinner, it was okay. I mean I’m not the biggest seafood person so it was hard for me to find something I liked, but it was actually really fun. I went with some girls who live in my hall and it was nice to hang out with new people who thought I was funny. I don’t think too much else happened this week. If any of you struggle with anxiety, I’m sure you understand how hard it is to do any more than necessary to go out, so even meals were often spent in my room. This is so hard for me because I’m not trying to be antisocial, and people don’t understand that, if I could eat dinner with them, I would, if I could go to their rooms and watch movies, I would. I wish people could understand that.  It took me almost all night to do things like homework because it’s hard to work through it. Like even my blog posts are taking me longer to do, it’s hard to work through it. So yeah, it’s been a long week.

Anyway, this coming week is basically going to be week of hell. I’m swearing a lot in this post sorry. I have four exams, a paper, and a lab packet due. I have no tests tomorrow, but lots of studying to do, I’m thinking my bio exam will Tuesday, but the professor hasn’t emailed us yet or anything yet, for sure I have a sociology test and I have no idea what to expect for that, and then Wednesday I have my Arabic exam which will basically be torture, and studying for that begins as soon I as hit publish on this, I also I have to hand in my final draft paper in Model UN and I did awful on my first draft so I’m not looking forward to that, Thursday comes with an Environmental Problems test and a confused professor so that should be interesting, and then FINALLY Friday I have to hand in a lab packet. Literally this week is going to be so long and I don’t have time for this anxiety so it better chill out. After lab on Friday I’m actually going home again, but this has been planned for a while. Lindsay’s home for different reasons so I’m getting coffee with her and hopefully Katie too on Saturday. I don’t think I really have anything else going on this week, so I guess that’s going to be it for this post.

XOXO

Mary.

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Studying Part 2?..?

So I think I may have talked about studying a little bit before. This is something I am not particularly good at because in high school I never really did. If I was in a hard class I let myself struggle but there’s only been two math classes that I have gotten less than a “B” in, all of my other classes were either A’s or B’s.  Now I’m in college and I really want to do well, but I actually have to study. This is weird because I want to do well, and I would have done a lot better in high school if I would’ve studied.   I just finished Arabic flashcards for a QUIZ tomorrow, not even a test! Now I’m studying for my mass media midterm and tomorrow I have to study for my History exam (which I probably don’t have to study too hard for). For me this is just weird because I am not used to this at all. I would maybe read over some stuff in high school here or there, look at my notes, or maybe make some flash cards for a final, but never for little exams or quizzes.

Basically my point is that just because you’re good at school in high school it does not mean that you will be good at school in college, a little more effort may need to be put forth in studying. So this was a short little piece on my studying life.

Sorry I’m still kinda in a funk, hopefully I’ll be better soon.

Also this is a little side note question- did any of you watch my YouTube video? Should I do another?

Okay well I love all 22 of you maybe I’ll do a little tag post out of excitement and such.  Thanks for reading guys it means the world to me.

XOXO

Mary

Update Report

So oh my word guys no updates for a long time because DRAMA! Thursday, just as I was about to start a topic, I think it was like studying or something random but than something happened in my room that I was NOT comfortable with at all so I ended up leaving but I forgot my key so I was locked out until my roommate was supposed to get back at midnight but she didn’t so I ended up spending the night in another building on my friends floor. The situation did not improve over the next few days so I spent the majority of time avoiding my room and unable to update you guys on my progress.  I am now no longer avoiding my room but I’m not going to lie I spend the majority of my time now with my headphones in.

And my twitter broke which makes me sad so I’m not motivated. But that’s a long confusing story that leads to me only being able to get on it on my iPad.

Anyway midterms are this week so I wish all of you well. I think I did pretty well on my math one today and I have my Arabic one tomorrow and hopefully that goes well. If you guys need any advice on anything or want to talk feel free to message me, email me, or comment below. I’m here for you guys because you mean so much to me. Thanks for reading! Feel free to follow me on twitter @mrmilligan13 and if you send me a tweet saying you read my blog I’ll follow you back :) Love you all!

XOXO

Mary