Late Night Blogging with Mary: Part 20

late night blogging with mary

I’m exhausted. Just like physically exhausted. My IT class has already kept me up until 2 am two nights ago and until 12 last night and it’s only the second week of classes.

This semester is going to be long. I just know it. Maybe this light dusting of snow will give me a delay tomorrow, I would not complain. I would like to have a week off due to snow delays and days off in total because they added a week to our calendar. We’re supposed to get this huge snow storm this weekend, but I have a feeling that it won’t happen. Also, I hate that, weekend storms are the worst. I always have to move my car through the icy campus and they wait until Sunday to actually plow/salt anything. Maryland doesn’t do snow well.

My classes thus far are interesting, yet I know they will be challenging. I’m already learning new things in nearly all of my classes, which is great because usually it’s still a review. I’m glad that I’m finally getting interested in what I’m learning about. Advanced Reporting is probably  my least favorite class, but Online Journalism is probably my favorite, we all know I have a little obsession with the internet.

This weekend I have a lot to do, and I would like to do some scrapbooking. I know I live a fascinating life and you were all dying to know that I just want to scrapbook. I want to try and get a head start on my homework that way I’m not procrastinating. This week when I tried to get ahead on my IT homework, the site was down, so that didn’t help my procrastination at all. My philosophy is this semester the farther ahead I get the easier life will be in the long run. We’ll see how that works out.

I really want to get into being more creative. I feel like I’m just letting all of my creative energy fall to the wayside while I don’t do much with my free time. I need to devote more of my free time to creative things and less to Netflix and doing nothing.

I don’t know if I’ve written this anywhere, but I’m very glad to be back at school with my friends, but it does take some adjusting. I hardly recognize anyone and all of last week I just felt like I had to leave soon. I think it’s just starting to sink in that I’m not going back to Ireland anytime soon, however, I am glad to be back. You can’t dwell on the fact that you’re back in the US, otherwise you’ll never move on in life, so I’m just accepting it and moving on.

Everyone seems to just be going back to school, but how are your semesters going so far? Or jobs? Or just life in general?

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The Hum Drum of Life.

I got out of my last class a little early today and as I was walking back to my dorm as I do every day I began having flashbacks upon flashbacks of doing it everyday.  Then it occurred to me that I do essentially the same thing everyday with little no variation, and the more I thought about it the more angry I became.  I wake up go to breakfast, study if I have time, to class, get lunch, study, go to class, relax as long as I can, study, go to dinner, study, get a shower go to bed. Every freaking weekday.

Then I started thinking more long term, and it really doesn’t get any better after this, except classes and studying turns into work and meetings.  I don’t know the more I think about the future the less and less I look forward to it. I don’t want to get stuck in the hum drum of life.  I’m so afraid that one day I’ll end up stuck and in a really bad place where I won’t want to be. Guys I keep writing about the future and how scared I am of it, sorry that’s negative I guess. But I’m sitting here in my bed in between piles of notebooks and books thinking about my two tests tomorrow and I’m at a loss for words because I’m only 19 and I’m stuck in the hum drum of things already. I don’t know I just don’t like it.

So here I am 19 years old trying to find a major at one of the smallest schools in the country question what on earth I could major in and not regret my decisions or hate the one I make ten years from now. I know my parents are going to see this and they’re going to say “most people don’t know at this time, it’s normal” but mom and dad, you know me, always worried about everything. I feel like most people have some sort of idea, and to be honest it’s time like these when I even question whether or not I should have gone to college, however, what would I be doing if I wasn’t here? Working at my dead end job? No thanks. So in the end I made the right decision to leave, but am I going to end up with a job in whatever I finally decide to  major in? Probably not.

I don’t know what to tell you guys. I don’t know what to tell myself to be honest. I keep writing my deep depressing thoughts. Sorry guys.

Anyway, completely unrelated note, does anyone know of any blogger conventions on the east coast? I know there are several on the west coast and I just can’t afford that. OR if anyone would want to maybe start one? I know it would be a lot of work so maybe for the next summer. There are so many for YouTubers, I really want to meet other bloggers! I don’t know, this could just be crazy thoughts. Someone contact me if you like this. If not eventually I’m going to find the money and travel to the west coast and go to conventions there and meet bloggers.  So basically I came up with this idea as I was peeing a second ago and took a brief break so it might not work at all. Actually it would work I would just need a lot of help and people to come but if it could work it would be really cool.  I have crazy ideas and help me with ideas if you think they’re crazy enough to work. I’m just plain crazy, let’s go with that. Okay I have stuff to do, back to the hum drum of life. Thanks for dealing with this craziness of my head you readers, it’s just a crazy mess of brain up there.

XOXO

Mary.

School Work and Thoughts on the Future.

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To be honest I hate doing school work, but I guess who does? The problem is for me that I do anything to avoid it, I’ll watch YouTube videos, read blogs, check my blog, write  posts, edit videos, basically anything but homework. I hate the fact that I’m learning things I could care less about. I want to learn exciting things, however to do that I need to be more interested in something, and I don’t know what that something is. I love history but what do history majors do? Teach, no thank you. I like writing, and I’m sorry if this offends anyone, but the journalism/ communication majors drive me insane and it’s hard to take classes with them. They think they know everything and I can’t stand people like that and I can’t see myself in an industry of people like that. So that leaves me with gen eds this semester, two sciences, sociology- which I don’t think is even a gen ed, I was considering double majoring in social work and political science, so my adviser recommended that but that’s not what I’m doing so it’s a waste of credits, yay, a language requirement- Arabic 102 which is the only thing keeping me away from my maybe major of Global Studies because I don’t think I can do two more semesters of that or place into a high enough Spanish so yeah, I don’t know what I’m doing, and finally Model UN which is way too much work for a one credit class if you ask me.

I hate the fact that when I get out of class around 3:30 everyday that I have to come back to my room, take a twenty minute break if I’m lucky and spend the rest of my night trying to do homework that I could care less about. I hate the fact that I have to try and decide what I’m going to spend the rest of my life doing by next year. This is all very stressful. I never thought in high school that I would be in college so unsure of what I was going to do. I guess I thought that it would just come to me, I don’t know why I thought that, I just thought it would. I know there are no short cuts to anywhere worth going, so I’m just going to take this journey where it leads me, and hopefully it’s not too bad. 

Well this post got a little bit more in depth than I thought it would, hopefully that’s okay though. 

XOXO

Mary.

Stress (Part 1)

So stress. Stress is a huge issue in college and if you read my post from earlier you probably realize that there is some stress in my life. I don’t know if this happens to any of you but when I get stressed I get sick. It gets to the point where I’m sitting either on or by the toilet waiting to vomit. To handle the pain I take Tums. Now this is not like I’m a druggie on Tums. No. They just calm my stomach and I would never take more than recommended. To deal with the stress itself I try a lot of things. First I breathe, which is always everyone’s first step. Seriously deep breaths like your gasping for air. Then as you guys know if you read my other posts, I love YouTube videos so I watch people that I find inspiring like Zoella and SprinkleofGlitter are my favorites. This just helps me to calm down. If it still doesn’t work I crochet. And if worse comes to worse I just go to bed. Well if I can, and if not I just try to forget about whatever is stressing me out. If it is a test study, and that’s all you can do. If it’s a paper, DO IT, you’ll stop stressing once it’s finished. If it’s life, ignore the problem because it will eventually go away. Let me know if I can help any of you guys with your stress stick it in the comments and I’ll help you guys out! So here’s a double post for you guys today and hopefully there will be another one soon!

Thanks so much!

XOXO

Mary