For anyone who has ever been on the internet we all know the meme “Forever Alone” and I’m sure everyone at one point or another has felt that way, but no one actually seems to want their life to be that way. I believe this is more of a male concentrated joke, and I don’t know why I think this I just do. However, if I were to wear a shirt, tweet, or write a status about my family would probably ridicule me for it along with the majority of society. A lot of this however comes from where I grew up, but I think this is a widespread problem.
Where I grew up it is expected that you date, or even court in some instances, then you go on and get married, have kids, quit your job and stay at home until you end up like my mom trying to get back into work but nobody wants to hire you because you have too much experience and they would have to pay you more so you end up with temporary positions.
For me, this is NEVER something that I wanted. I may have spend countless hours watching “Say Yes to the Dress” and “Four Weddings” and casually browsing the Wedding category on Pinterest, but that doesn’t mean I necessarily wanted to be in that position, and this lead everyone I know to think I’m actually crazy. While all my friends at school were searching for the perfect mate, I was into reading, coloring, building robots, crocheting, and building roller coasters, this wasn’t always a good thing. I never had a serious boyfriend, yes I did date two people in high school, but I would never say they were serious relationships.
Anyway this just seems like a double standard to me. Guys can sleep around, have crazy amounts of girlfriends, but I can’t. They can go around and play girls left and right, but I can’t even talk to a guy without being accused of putting him in the “friend zone” did I even mention how many times guys have put me in the friend zone? You don’t even know!
So back to being a kid and growing up as a girl. I believe this is something that I have touched on before but I think it is such a problem. As a little girl I played house with my mom’s friends son Ryan. He would wear my dad’s tie “go to work” and I would make us dinner at my little pretend kitchen. Like what the hell? I was a stay at home wife at the age of 3 or 4. I hate that. This brings me to a conversation I had with my five year old cousin over Thanksgiving break. She loves her baby dolls and playing house as well as what I recently found out boys. As a five year old my cousin does go to preschool and apparently she has asked every boy accept one to be her boyfriend, they all said no, and she was planning on asking the last one the day she went back. This has been something that my aunt has really been trying to discourage because she really wants to raise an independent daughter but with the princesses and so many shows have taught girls that they need boyfriends and husbands and then they can be successful in life, but that’s not true!
They need to start making role models who are single and independent. I don’t need a man to make me happy. This time of year I always question that though. My name is MARY, do you know how many lovey dovey Christmas movies have Mary as the main character who falls in love within the first ten minutes of the movie, A LOT! I don’t want to be one of those girls who swoons over boys and gets caught up in all that love shit because I’ve been there and I’ve hated every moment of it, but once in a while I do get tired of being alone and I want to be one of the many Marys in the movies. But then I remember that I want to be that independent role model that little girls like my baby cousin can look up to and see that you don’t need a man to be a great and successful woman, you can be all of that on your own.
Sorry about the super long erratic post that doesn’t make chronological sense, but I just have a lot of feelings on this subject and I am a rather erratic person. I would love to hear some other people’s views on this topic, so please comment below (I’ll follow anyone who comments). Also I was home for the weekend and very busy so sorry about the lack of posts. Hopefully there will be some more good ones to come soon! Thanks for reading!