Short Cuts to be a Pretend Adult

I don’t know if you guys know this but I pretend to be an adult, it’s in my twitter bio. I do things that make people think that I’m a grownup- heck the kids I babysit think I’m old, which is half true. I make up a lot of stuff to make it seem like I know what I’m doing. I mean if you’re close to me you really know that I don’t know what I’m doing (ever). I thought that maybe it would be useful to share my tips to be a productive pretend adult so that other people can do the same.

  1. Put your dirty towels on top of your favorite dirty clothes so you don’t take them out of the laundry and wear them again. It forces you to do your laundry so that you can wear your favorite items.
  2. When you know you have to wash your bed sheets (do it once a week and feel good about yourself) take off your pillow case because no one wants to sleep on a bare pillow.
  3. Limit the number of dishes you have that way you wash them faster because you run out faster.
  4. Don’t buy the fatty stuff. If you are trying to avoid potato chips don’t buy them at the store then they aren’t sitting in your room waiting to be eaten and tempting you.
  5. If you’re around sick people vitamin C is your best friend. They make them like cough drops and it’s in a lot of drinks and it’s good to not get sick.
  6. Bribe yourself to do work, but use very mundane things like showers and fruit snacks (of course fruit leather because fruit snacks are too sugary for my liking) and if you are really struggling use chocolate and little trips to the store.
  7. Do fun things that keep you young. I don’t like saying that because I’m only 20 but coloring and painting and doing any other crafts are relaxing. I’m also at that age where people think “abstract” art is cool so my random lines of paint are oddly visually appealing to some.
  8. Exercise and if you hate it like me, bribe yourself with Goldfish. That’s what I did yesterday. I’m trying one of those 7 minute workout app things and I’m sure it’s not effective at all, but I will pretend it is until I find the time and motivation to go on a real run.
  9. Pick positive influences and people to surround yourself with. There is no reason to be an adult and have “friends” who don’t give two shits about you.
  10. Go to Target, look at the grownup stuff, skip it all and then buy some chocolate or other random things you will never need. Target’s great for all of that.

What are your tips of being a grown up? I need all the help I can get.


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