Thoughts – Mary's Average Adventures

It’s like I blinked…

May 11, 2017MaryLeave a comment

This year I served as editor-in-chief for my college paper and I just wrote my last “From the desk of the editor.” In it I wrote about my college experience (it’s coming here soon) and I can’t get over how fast it all went.

It’s like I blinked and my life is totally different. It’s like I blinked and I’m 22. It’s like I blinked and it’s not my friends getting their permits anymore, it’s my little sister. It’s like I blinked an all of the people around me are new but wonderful. It’s like I blinked and I’m no longer just about to graduate high school.

This time four years ago I was ready to blink college away, ready to move out and get a job. I was going to college not because I wanted to keep learning but because it was a step in the right direction for what I wanted to do.

It’s like I blinked and all of the sudden I’m done. Handed in my last final, handed in my last project, and it’s done.

It’s like I blinked and the majority of my life that I’ve spent in a classroom is over. It’s like I blinked and college was done. It’s like I blinked and my friends are about to be dispersed across the country killing it at life. It’s like I blinked and I’m putting away all of my dorm stuff for the last time.

It’s crazy to think that my learning journey is nearly over. This blog has been with me through it all. It hold the crazy anxiety journey that I’ve been through over the past four years, all of the trials and tribulations of my life. My thoughts, opinions, adventures. Everything. My life for the past four years can be pieced together from the posts on this blog. It’s like I blinked through over 600 posts, four years of writing, what feels like a gazillion jobs, just everything. While, yes my college years are over, this blog is not. Be ready for that rebrand my friends.

What have you been blinking through?

Late Night Blogging with Mary: Part 29

April 21, 2017Mary2 Comments

Once upon a time, I started this blog because I was going to college and I wanted to document the most mundane of adventures. Did I ever really do that? Not really. It has been three and a half years of rants, thought vomit, out of this world adventures, and sometimes just straight non-sense.

Yesterday, I hit 500 followers. I didn’t cry or shout like I thought I would (well I was at work) but I did get teary eyed. a little shaken and quite frankly a little overwhelmed. That’s a lot of people my friends.

Anyway, so thank you for that. It’s very moving.

Speaking of moving, I have been watching “Girl Boss” which is slightly inspiring. Like Sophia is a one-of-a-kind type of gal who doesn’t always do what’s best and not always what I would do. However, she is quite the go-getter, which is admirable. The show starts off with Sophia (the main character) going on about how being an adult sucks; which is a sentiment I am starting to sympathize with.

While applying for many, many jobs I have found it to be barely bearable. I’m honestly so over it. It’s so boring and excruciatingly painstaking. However, I shall press on and find a job that will do until I have a million children and can start up my mommy blog.

So here’s just a short little LNBM for now. Still working on the re-brand. I’d say by June it’ll be full swing.

Note to Self:

March 23, 2017MaryLeave a comment

Yes you did brush your teeth this morning so stop worrying about it already!

Recently I’ve been facing a problem where if I do not write every single thing I need to do down, it’s not going to be remembered and therefore is unlikely to actually occur. I thought a little “note to self” might be of use today.

You’re going to write those articles, answer those emails, and do your homework, it’s on the to-do list and will get done, it’s a guarantee. What you need to remember is to put yourself first. Everyone around you has opinions, and they are great. The people around you are great, but sometimes, your thoughts matter more.

What do you want to do today? Do you want to cook dinner? Go to the store? Go to class? Do what you need to do, then pick and choose.

A note to self- worry about you and what you can control. There’s so much that falls outside of your realm of control, try not to worry about it.

Self-care is sometimes the most important thing you can do for yourself so don’t skip it, just embrace it.

Tackle your to-do list and write notes to yourself until you get everything done.

Going Soy and Dairy Free

March 15, 2017MaryLeave a comment

For lent this year, in addition to my typical no fried food give up, I decided to do something very good for my diet and give up soy and dairy as well.

My mom said that she’s pretty sure I’ve always been lactose intolerant, I was diagnosed, then un-diagnosed in the fifth grade. However, my body has never really tolerated it that well, and it’s been something I needed to quit for a long time, so God was really the best excuse to finally do it. In addition to being lactose intolerant, I found out the very hard way that I was soy intolerant, almost worse than my lactose problem. So I decided to give up both.

This has been a lot harder than I thought and I think I’m only about two weeks in, so I thought I would give you some tips.

What to Eat

Enjoy Life products are dairy, soy, peanut, and gluten free, along with a host of other allergens. You can also see what places sell what items on their website.
Annie’s brand products. Be careful depending on how allergic you are because something in the factory use dairy so just be advised. I’ve found snacks at Target and Giant Eagle.
Almonds. For some reason I have had the most luck with almonds. Almond milk, almond the snack food, and they come in different flavors.
Subway. While you have to skip the cheese and flat bread, with a simple Google search you can find a complete list of allergens in each item you might want in your sub.

Cooking Tips

The more basic the better.
Buy veggies, go with simple things like chicken
Make sure everything you’re cooking with doesn’t have soy or dairy, including any oils and cooking sprays.

Anyone else soy and dairy free?

Trying to Date as 20-Something

March 9, 2017Mary5 Comments

Dating sucks and I hate it. I hate the start of relationships where you have to get to know someone and trying to figure out the way they think, how to understand them, and just all those little things. I can’t think of anything about dating that I like. I can’t even count the number of times in a week where I want to call my mom and ask her to just arrange my marriage.

I was recently ghosted. Or maybe that’s still an occurring thing. I don’t really know how long of a process that typically is, but all I know is that I’m pretty pissed about it. Like really, you’re in your twenties, I’m willing to have a conversation, so let’s talk about it. I find myself to be a reasonable person, and ghosting makes me totally unreasonable. So to the guy that’s ghosting/ghosted me, if you’re reading this, I’m a catch and because of your unwillingness to have a conversation with me, you’re missing out boy. Also mom and dad- I don’t want to talk about it. I would be lying if I said I’ve never ghosted anyone, I mean I tried. I was unsuccessful because I feel like shit leaving someone in the dark like that.

I know that I’m a relatively easy person to date (at least in my opinion). I don’t require fancy dates (my favorite places are IHOP and Target) or even that much attention, a text a day suffices for me. However, I never seem to be enough for the boys that pay attention to me, or I require too much. Honestly, the last guy who was actually my boyfriend couldn’t do enough for me so I broke up with him. That sounds really shitty, but he complained if I asked to go on a walk around the park, not even if we could get a coffee.

So I don’t understand why I find dating so complicated. I sometimes feel as if I have convoluted ideas behind dating. I can be quoted of saying “Did I miss the day in school where everyone learned to talk to people they’re attracted to?” Other than my lack of flirtation skills, I can’t get a guy to notice me. Well, I can, just not the ones that I want to, and I don’t know why that is.

I feel like I’m starting to get a little side-tracked (naturally) in this post. Really, the thing is, there is not one good thing about dating in your twenties. Tinder sucks and it’s how to meet some really shitty people. I would be curious to know if anyone has actually had good, continued success on the app, because I would say I had brief and okay success but now I will never use it again.

I’m not one to blame things on social media because I love it more than most other things. However, it does make dating harder. It makes reading into someone’s personal life a lot easier and actually talking to someone a lot more difficult. Like, if I just start seeing someone I am not about to tweet some T-Swift lyrics because that’s unfortunately the kind of thing that freaks guys out whether or not it has anything to do with them. They might not even follow me on social media yet and I won’t tweet it just in case they decide to creep. Fortunately, I’m not the type to get mad if a guy likes another girl’s picture, or retweets something, but there are people that get into actual fights over such things. While, I may find that little bit out there, it’s a real problem. Social media might be hurting our dating lives.

On the other hand, social media has done this awesome thing that it usually does, which is bring people together. I am curious to know if that works for people. I know a girl who started dating someone on Instagram, like they had mutual friends (I think) and they hit it off through comments. To me, that’s kinda crazy and I don’t think that happens a lot, but maybe I’m wrong. My goal is that an attractive man will see how hilarious I am on Twitter and slide into my DMs, I doubt it will happen but a girl can dream.

At the end of the day, my thoughts behind dating is that it sucks and I want an arranged marriage. No, not really, but it does suck. They’re are too many ways for it to go downhill. For someone like me, that is a tough thing to grasp sometimes. Post-graduation I would really like to have a steady man in my life that likes me and treats me well. Preferably, he has aspirations of things and goals he will obtain. Obviously, I’ll keep you posted on any male suiters (only after they know about the blog and they stick around past the “dating” phase of things).

What do you think about dating as a twenty-something?

So I’ve been 22…

February 16, 2017Mary8 Comments

Okay so I didn’t write last year (2016) around my birthday, why? Because I wasn’t writing. Am I getting better now? A little bit but not really. So, in order to try and be a better blogger I’m going to write about 22 so far.

Here’s the thing: I’m feeling it, I’m feeling 22. It’s my Taylor Swift year, and that’s the best way to look at it as a positive thing in my opinion. I have not been taking aging in my twenties thus far very gracefully, each year is met with extreme expectations that are never quite met with the enthusiasm that I picture to be. So, by making this my Taylor Swift year I’m attempting to live my life like the “22” song that everyone seems to be quoting on their Instagrams this fateful year. As well as a host of all the Taylor Swift songs that I’ve ever aspired to see myself in.

Now, I’m the first of my friends for the most who turned 22 back in September, so that’s always been like an existential thing for me, it just makes me feel older than I am. However, I would say this was definitely the best celebration yet for 22 and I had started off my year on quite the kick. By that I mean I got pretty drunk with some of my best friends. I think that set a precedent for 22. Yes, I’m drinking more than I ever have (once a week, chill out, nothing too crazy) but it’s okay. This is my last year as a pre-adult so I’m doing whatever I want for one more year and I think that’s really okay.

22 so far has been a time for self-actualization and self-love. I’ve been letting myself really do what I want, I mean I’m sure the Zoloft helps with that, but I’m finally doing things that I’ve always wanted to but stopped myself from doing. While I’m still often referred to as mom, I’m doing less-momish things and putting myself first sometimes. Not all the time, I do still have a problem saying no, but I’m trying to get better at it. I’ve also gotten a lot better at trying to make my life work for me, and at the end of the day what’s going to make me happy.

22 so far has been a time for friendships and lack of toxic relationships. The week after my birthday I started cutting out people who were toxic to me because that isn’t something I need to deal with. So I’ve worked on friendships with people who equalize their relationship with me, if that makes sense. Yes friendships are a two-way street, and sometimes they require more give than take, but it shouldn’t be that way all the time. So I found new friends, grew old friendships, formed new ones, and left the bad ones. There are too many good people in this world to surround yourself with people who make you feel bad about yourself.

22 so far has been a time for thoughts surrounding my future, as if that isn’t what I’ve been doing for the past four years of college. However, now it’s different. It’s more real. I’m applying for jobs, seeing what is best for me and my future. I have to think about things like benefits and the cost of living in cities where I apply to jobs compared to the salary. It’s a lot to think about.

So far, I think 22 has been good to me, maybe I’ll update you when I turn 23 about how the rest of the year goes. For now, I’m feelin’ 22.

Are you 22? Did you learn something new about yourself when you were?

So your not a feminist…

January 29, 2017MaryLeave a comment

Okay I get it. You are a woman and you’re not like other women. You’ve never faced adversity so you don’t really need feminism. You don’t understand why so many women are afraid of this presidency. Seriously, he said “Grab ’em by the pussy,” and then he took away the right to birth control. We are living in a society where rape culture is perpetuated, but the president.

Okay but good for you, you are “not like other girls” because you haven’t faced any problems related to your gender, and for your sake, I hope you never do.

Here’s the thing though, I’m fighting for you. I’m fighting for your right to be a stay at home mom, your right for affordable healthcare, your right for an equal pay check, and anything else you might need that someone out there wants to keep from you.

The best thing about America (hoping it stays that way) is that we have our freedom of speech, and God gave us free-will so you really don’t need to be a feminist. I just wish you would realize what the cause actually meant.

I don’t want all of you non-feminists out there to think that I find myself better than you, I don’t, seriously. I’ve seen that comment so many places, and it’s just not true. I love you so much, I just want the best for you, your daughters, your mothers, your sisters, and any other woman that has impacted your life in a positive way.

Feminism isn’t just for women. It’s for everyone and everyone can benefit, I wish you were a feminist, and I’ll never understand those of you who say you are not, however, I will fight for you. Fight for your rights. Fight for our equality.

Remember, at the end of the day, this shouldn’t be a discussion. All people are equal, treat each other as such.

My Final Semester

January 16, 2017MaryLeave a comment

Tomorrow is my last first day of school. I might’ve said that last semester, but really this is the last one. I have never been so excited but so nervous for school to be over.

It’s weird because this is really the beginning of the end. Five months from now I’m going to be a “real” adult. No more walk-in meal under the lump sum of my meal plan, same with the apartment. Work will no longer be holding babies and doing random things for the marketing department (okay depending on how things work out that could still be a thing) but really, my life is about to really change over the next few months.

I cannot begin to describe how quickly the past four years have gone and how much I have changed. I really do feel like it was just yesterday I was dreading going back for another semester, and this year I was itching to get back. Reflecting on my time at Hood has been amazingly reassuring to me, as well as my future.

I’m not good at change, and I never have been, yet it’s something I’ve craved for as long as I can remember. Maybe it’s because of my major FOMO and I want to know what else the world can offer me, if it’s not that I don’t know what it could be. However, whenever I get to the new I end up afraid of missing what I left behind which is probably why I hated my freshman year of college.

I think the greatest lessons I learned during my time here so far, well those outside of class includes who to trust, how to get to that point, and not everyone changes/evolves at the same rate as you. College has allowed me to meet a lot of people and realize what I’m looking for not only in friends but mentors and bosses.

UPDATED Netflix Suggestions

January 5, 2017Mary6 Comments

Are you ready for a lot of snow days? Or just a Saturday that you don’t want to do anything but veg out in front of the TV (literally me everyday)? Well I’ve got you covered for at least a few binge sessions.

A long, long time ago, I gave some of my favorite shows on Netflix, however, in the two and a half years since I’ve watched a LOT of shows and have a whole list of new favorites. To be honest, a lot of them will be kind of weird and creepy because that’s what I’ve been into lately so keep that in mind.

3% — I watched this with Aleyna and I think there were probably a few nights where we stayed up past my bedtime to get another episode in. It was one of those shows that if I wasn’t watching it with someone I would have finished it in a day. Originally in Portuguese, so the mouths and words don’t line up very well, but it is very good. It is a society where only 3% of the population can make it to the promise land and live happily and peacefully.
The 100 — This was recommended to me by my blogging accountability buddy and friend, Katie. I think I watched it in a week. Three seasons (which is always a plus for me) that are a little creepy but really good.
The OA — Amazing. Only one season, but truly amazing.
The Office — Okay so maybe this was one the last one too, but really, you need to watch it and if you haven’t yet, what are you doing? Guaranteed to make you laugh at least once or I’ll do a cartwheel for you because that’s pretty impressive.
Scrubs — Another funny show. I was watching it to fall asleep to, but I got sucked it and ended up staying up to watch it, so I went back to How I Met Your Mother for that, but it is really funny. I had seen an episode here and there, but not the whole series, and it’s really funny. The last season is a little disappointing, but it’s still really good.
Stranger Things — Okay not to be that person, but I did watch the whole season the day it came out and before it was super hyped. If I would’ve heard about it after all the hype, I probably wouldn’t watch it just because it was too much for me. However, it was so good and totally worth the hype around it. If you haven’t seen it yet, definitely check it out.
Black Mirror — Each episode is different and each episode will confuse the heck out of you but in the best way.
Quantico — So good. I was staying caught up with it on TV but of course I lost my spot and I’ll catch up once the season is on Netflix. However, it’s about the FBI training school and someone in the group committed an act of terror. The way it is set up, is a back and forth way of things which is pretty cool.
Containment — Watching as I write this. I guess I’m kind of into sci-fi-ish shows right now. It is about when a virus breaks out and a portion of Atlanta is under lock down. I highly recommend it.
Good Girls Revolt — Well this is not technically on Netflix, but Amazon Prime. However, it had to make the list just because I could not stop watching it. It’s about a newsroom in the 1960s and it’s so good. The feminism is perfection. It makes you want to change the world. It’s set to be cancelled, but I am hopeful that someone will pick it up.

What are you currently binge watching? Or just regular watching?

2017 Goals

December 31, 2016December 31, 2016Mary2 Comments

The yearly post. This is quite possibly the only yearly blog post that I have routinely written. As I wrote in a post earlier this week, I am beyond ready for the new year, and here are the many (that I will hopefully keep) goals for 2017. As I point out every year (I think), I make goals rather than resolutions because I don’t want to make myself change but rather just make goals to achieve, if that makes any sense. This year a lot revolve around my blog because other than Donald it was probably my biggest disappointment of 2016.

Blog at LEAST three times a week.
Go self-hosted, break out of .wordpress (eek!!)
Get my first real adult job doing something I love.
Move out of my parent’s house.
Travel somewhere cool.
Grow in my relationships with God and Jesus.
Learn something new
Eat better– i.e. eventually no more dairy or soy, the crux of all of my stomach issues
Find a therapist wherever I end up post-graduation to continue positively growing with my mental health.
Be creative all the time, in thinking, in daily life, constantly expanding my mind in creativity.

What are your goals for the new year?’